Red Beard, Episode 3: Aground

RED BEARD

EPISODE 3: Aground

            It is early morning aboard Red Beard’s ship the black hulled William and Mary.  The pirate captain is asleep in his cabin when sudden commotion from the quarter deck awakens him.  “Now what,” he mutters in disgust as he sits up and pulls on his shirt?  Suddenly, the ship lurches to a halt, throwing Red Beard forward to the deck.  The giant pirate picks himself off the deck only to run his head into the bottom on the small chart table he has landed under.  “Damnation!” he yells rushing from his cabin into the passage way leading to the quarter deck.

            “What’s happened, John” Consuello asks emerging half dressed from her cabin?

“Damned if I know!”  Red Beard rushes past the she pirate and nearly tears the door off its hinges as bursts onto the quarter deck.  “All hands on deck!  Lookout, what’s about?  Man the . . .!  “What the hell . . .?!” 

  The pirate captain stops dead in his tracks, incredulous at the chaotic scene before him.  The black hulled William and Mary sits hard aground on a sand bar off Jamaica.  Pharaoh and Roger are arguing as they chase the Boy Prince about the quarter deck.  The boy dashes past the stunned pirate captain.  Roger, in hot pursuit, dashes by Red Beard nearly knocking him down.  The boy evades Roger’s grasp, trips Roger who lands with a thud a Red Beards feet, then disappears down a hatchway   Stede and a crewman are desperately lowering sail while aloft the lookout hangs perilously from the edge of the crows nest.

Roger picks himself up off the deck and comes face to face with his irate chief.  “Good morning, Captain,” he stutters?

“Good morning,” Red Beard roars!!??  The sound of Red Beards voice brings the chaos to an end.  Red Beard paces the deck shouting furiously.  “Stede, how did this happen?  I turn in for a few hours sleep and we run aground!”

            “Captain, I wasn’t on watch, Roger and Pharaoh were,” Stede replies as he finishes lowering sail.

            Turning to Pharaoh and Roger, Red Beard barks, “Well?  What happened?”

            Sheepishly the two pirates stand before their captain.  The two begin speaking at once.  “It was really nothing . . .  The kid was . . .   An accident . . .“

            “One at a time you fools!”

            “Roger was in charge” Pharaoh quickly answers.

            “You had the helm,” Roger replies.

            “You let that kid on deck . . . “

            ”Enough,” Reb Beard roars!  “What happened?”

            “The kid wanted to get some air so Roger let him up on deck.  He started to play around so I let him call out the compass headings for me,” Pharaoh answers.

            Red Beard is incredulous.  “You let a twelve year old play with the compass?!”

            “It was the only way to stop him from playing with the helm,” interjects Roger.

            “The helm?!  Who let him near the helm, “ roars the pirate captain?

            “He did,” Roger and Pharaoh say pointing to each other.

            “Stede, you and Pharaoh bring that kid here,” Red Beard barks.  “And get the rest of the crew on deck.”

            Just as Pharaoh and Stede set off to fetch the boy, the pirate ship of the Captain Bonnet sails by.  Bonnet’s crew is laughing and pointing at the grounded William and Mary.  “Ahoy there Little Johnny,” Bonnet calls out.  “Can’t you navigate or were you trying to plow a canal?”

            “A mistake at the helm.  I’ll be off this sand bar by noon.  And don’t call me Little Johnny,” Red Beard roars!

            “Sure Johnny.  Just wait till I tell Edward what his little brother did!”

            “Blast you Bonnet!  I’ll set your liver on fire if you tell Edward or any one about this!”

            “See you in Port Royale, Johnny.  If you dare to show your face.  Or can find your way,” Bonnet calls out laughing as his ship pulls away.

            Red Beard is livid at Bonnet’s heckling.  “Damnation, Roger, I hate being compared to Edward.  All my life it’s always been Edward this, Edward that.  Why don’t you behave like your big brother?”  Red Beards ranting is interrupted by Stede and Pharaoh who return, dripping wet, with the boy and his guardian Michelle in tow.  “What happened to you two,” Teech asks?

            “The little heathen tried to murder us,” Stede replies pointing to Juan.

            “Heathen,” Juan shouts!  “Oww . . ,” Stede yells as the kid stomps his foot!    “I’m no heathen,” Juan shouts as he stomps and kicks Stede and Pharaoh into howls of pain.  “The Archbishop of Madrid himself baptized me!”

            Red Beard grabs Juan by the collar and holds him off the deck.  “Hold your tongue or I’ll use it for tuna bait.  Stede, what happened?”

            “He smeared lard all over the deck outside the gangway.  We did a full gainer off the forecastle overboard.”

            “Where was the crew,” Red beard asks?

            “Stuck to gun deck,” Pharaoh answers.  “The brat smeared pine tar all over it.”

            Red Beard is livid.

“Unhand him you brute,” Michelle says, trying to protect her charge, “He’s a mere boy.”

            “Mere boy,” the pirate roars?  “Madame, this mere boy has done more damage to me in an hour than Her Majesty’s Navy’s done in a year!  Ransom or not I ought to . . .”

“Don’t loose your temper,” Consuello says joining the group.  “We need the money.”

“Blast you’re right woman,” Red beard says calming down.  “But now we need another ship.” Thinking quickly the pirate says, “Stede, gather the crew.  We’ll march over land and seize a ship in St Johns.  It’s only a mile on the other side of this peninsula.”

            “How do I get them off the deck,” Stede asks?

            “Pry then off!  They wont miss a little hide!”

            “What about the hostages,” Consuello asks?

            “Leave them here with Roger.  We’ll pick them up later.”

            “For God’s sake,” Roger implores, “don’t leave me here with them!”

            “You got us on this sand bar,” the captain replies.

            “Saints preserve me,” Roger moans.
            Looking aloft, Red Beard notices the lookout still struggling to get back into the crows nest. “And somebody get him down from there.”  

Meanwhile . . .  Elsewhere . . .